Posts Tagged ‘work’

Too Much Caffeine is Bad For You

October 15, 2010

Yesterday I splurged and got myself a weak flat white. Apparently the universe was trying to tell me to cut out the caffeine, because it did not end well.

I sat at my desk, and put the take away coffee up to my mouth. The lid was not on the cup properly. I poured the entire cup of coffee all down my once crisp white shirt.

I raced to the bathroom, took the shirt off and rinsed it under the tap to get as much coffee out as I could. Then I realised we don’t have hand dryers in the bathrooms, they are stocked with paper towels. Fantastic, now I was in a wet, see through white shirt.

I ended up running down to the gym change rooms (yes, work has a gym. no, I have never used it.) and drying my shirt with a hair-dryer. I wandered around for the rest of the day being followed by the faint aroma of coffee.


Hot Stuff

June 25, 2010

This morning I had a lovely sleep in, as I was headed to the office that is only 1 suburb away rather than trekking into town. (Sidenote: The staff in that division must wonder why I am always so open to come out to their office to work. I tell them it’s because I care. Really, I just like sleeping in and getting home early.)

I made a cup of hot milo at 8:15am, just before I left for work. (Sidenote: And was at my desk by 8:25, suckers!) I put my milo in this travel mug.

At 11am, I finally finished that milo. That cup works so well I could hardly drink it for ages. This thing is magic – it keeps a drink hot for almost 3 hours!

Sad really that these are the highlights of my day.

Location, Location, Location

April 8, 2010

Today I am working at a different office than usual, because it’s not enough that I have an office at one location and a desk at Head Office – I need to have a third place to be as well. All 3 locations really could use someone there full time, so I am contemplating some cloning activity in the future, however for the moment will have to be satisfied with never knowing quite where I have to be the next day. A 3rd location is not such a bad thing, before you frown at yet another woe-is-me episode. This office is a 10 minute drive from home. In heavy traffic. Only 5 on a good day. You have to be happy with that!

This morning was an exercise in futility trying to find my way in – forgetting that I like to get to work early (because I also like to slip away early, not because I love mornings or anything – don’t come near me before 11 if you don’t want your head snapped off), my boss had not explained just how to get into the building before business hours. I spent some time wandering around the site just after 7am this morning wondering why I was not still in bed and how to get in the damn door. I’ve worked it out now. All I need to do next is remember the location on this office – I got lost in the building earlier this morning and had to get help from a passing stranger. I bet it made their day.

Today I am residing in my boss’s office. The boss with the good sense of humour. Hope the boss enjoys the little notes I left him, commenting on his desk.

(if you can’t read this it says “Germaphobe? You? Nah!!!”

I’m pretty sure he’s not a germaphobe actually, for although he does have isowipes and hand sanitiser, he also has 2 inch thick dust on his desk. Well, he used to – I wasn’t about to sit in that all day so the isowipes came in rather handy!

I am worried about what else he’s been up to though.

(If you can’t read these the left says “What The? You been picking locks or something?” and the right says “P.S. I broke my laptop putting this into my disk drive. Kidding – I would have, but I don’t have a disk drive…)

That ex-paperclip sure looks like it’s been used for something nefarious. The calculator is too cool though – see that thing in the shape of a 3.5″ disk? The metal clip part slides down to turn it on and reveal the screeny bit of the calculator. I can’t imagine how many people screwed up their computers when these were given out, which would have been some time ago I’d imagine. Possibly around the same era that folks everywhere were breaking CD Rom drives and calling their help desks to report the cup holder being broken.

The view out of his office windows is gorgeous. Shortly after snapping this, I went for a walk around the block just to enjoy the sunshine. After a few dreary days of rain this week the blue sky is most welcome!

Look! Greenery even! I await how excellent I believe the view to be in a week, when school goes back after the Easter break – over the street there is a school. Must go now – I have some googling to do on how to soundproof windows.

Take Note!

February 17, 2010

I find the site Passive Aggressive Notes rather amusing. Possibly because I could see myself writing the odd one. Like the time I left a note on the fridge at work saying “To the thief that stole my yoghurt, hope you choke on it and die”, only to later have to leave another one next to it saying “Erm, about that? Yep, never mind, I found it in the freezer, right where I left it while trying to make frozen yoghurt”. Hey, it made me laugh at least!

The last few weeks I’ve had 2 or 3 sets of headphones pinched from my spare desk (I have an office at the building I spend most time at, and a cell cubicle at head office, where I have to go around once a week). Today I decided it was time for another passive aggressive note.

PS My ears are clean, really. Oh, and they are not pus filled.


February 2, 2010

Work is erk and will continue to be so for some weeks, I fear. While I was away swanning around the Northern Territory, 4 of my team have moved on to other jobs. I was part of a team of 6 – now it is just me and the boss. With budgets for all our state’s various business divisions to get through in the next few weeks. And I just ordered almost half a million bucks worth of equipment that in my absence the geeks discovered was unexpectedly incompatible with everything in place at work. I took notes on the issues this morning. The last thing written in my long chain of notes about how we could do x but then y wouldn’t work, I wrote “= shit creek, no paddle”.

The boss asked me to send him something about what strategy I recommended. I did eventually send some info over but not before I sent a message saying “Dunno about you mate but my strategy is that I am going to buy a Lotto ticket at lunchtime and pray really hard it wins”. He quickly advised he wanted to go halves in the ticket. Otherwise it might be just him stuck in this creek.

With all this excitement (amongst a million other dramas) going on, boss man has been understandably a little busy and slow when replying to some messages of late. So when I sent him a message a while ago that I really wanted him to read and fast, I made the subject “Will you be a referee for an interview I have next week”. Then inside, of course, was written “HAHAHA, just kidding, I really wanted a quick yes/no to this question and wanted you to read it fast.”

Well, this may have backfired. He still hasn’t replied to that one. Heh.

My New Boss is Kind of Cool

October 22, 2009

With the restructure at work I think I might have landed a boss who gets me. Or at least, one who doesn’t report me for my dreadful behaviour.

The scene: My desk. Earlier today an email went out company wide announcing my new boss’ job, except they spelled the Manager at the end of his job title as Manger.

12 to New Boss:

Very much looking forward to having you as my Manger. I have purchased a nativity scene for you to display at your desk to remind you of the importance of your new role.

New Boss to 12:

If they can go from Manager to Manger, imagine what you get from Analyst…

12 to New Boss:

Um. Like I told my other half. I don’t do that. Or swallow. So you can just rethink that one.

New Boss to 12:

I hadn’t actually thought that far through and might not have ended up in the same place. But I am now. Brrrrr!

You Should See the Other Guy

October 20, 2009

Since Friday many people have asked me what I have done to my hand. My instant response is “You should see the other guy!”, followed by a sorry shake of the head and perhaps a little faux boxing action. Of course, reality is far different, but the true story as to why I am sporting a bandaged wrist is far more boring – I was on my way to work on Friday when a charming man in a business suit shoved me in his panic to get off the train, and I went flying. No, he did not stop to see if I was ok. Pig.

On my arrival at work, my simple request for an ice pack sent the first aid officer absolutely mental. I had some trouble understanding why I would need to be carried on a stretcher for a sore arm. Turns out they haven’t had a first aid incident since the new first aid room opened and they all got trained so it was an exciting day. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if they sneaked in a few photos to put in the weekend papers. And so off to the doctor I was sent, with requests for x rays and reports, for this was a workers comp claim, having happened on the way to work.

If you ever hurt yourself, please let it be at work! I have never had such fuss made of me. The cynical amongst you would say that’s because it’s like free money for the medical practice, the insurance company probably pays more than medicare. I found it hard to believe that I had to beg the doctor to be allowed to come back to work today, Tuesday, several days after the incident, and now several work days behind! So I am back on light duties only. I didn’t bother explaining to the doctor that light duties would cover any day.

Short Week, Long Face

October 8, 2009

It might have been a short week this week after the public holiday on Monday, but it seems to have been the longest short week in the whole world.

My bank are a bunch of arses. The paperwork for my new mortgage has so far been lost twice and once drawn up with the wrong surname on it. I still haven’t signed it and I am supposed to, by court order, give my ex a rather large cheque by COB tomorrow. I somehow doubt that is going to happen on time. I finally got an apologetic email from my mortgage broker after I emailed him this morning and suggested that when the paperwork was ready perhaps he could deliver it to me IN JAIL, where I will be languishing, having been thrown in the clink. I still do not have a contract to sign, however.

The Boyfriend got the shits and quit his job yesterday. Idiot. Personally I think a better plan may have been to get a new job first, then tell them how they are a bunch of *insert appropriate word here*s.

Yesterday I got confirmation that while I will still have a job and the same salary in the restructure, my job title changes to something about 5 levels down. Oh, and I’ll be responsible for more than before. The new job title in no way reflects what I will really be doing and that shits me immensely.

A friend’s girlfriend who had a bad asthma attack and failed to get CPR in time during the recent dust storms has just had her life support turned off. Her 13 year old child thinks that because she has not died yet she will recover. The doctors tell us she is brain dead.

I made The Boyfriend’s parents very teary last night when they realised that me getting my house back might mean we spend less time with them. I feel like a thief who is taking away their baby (their grown up fully adult baby but whatever).

I feel torn about having made The Ex leave my house – I have been financially supporting him for about 3 years while he plays a stupid online game that rhymes with Schmorld of Schmarcraft for about 15 hours a day. It is finally time to pull the plug, move him out of my house, stop paying his bills, and give him a big cheque in exchange for the deed to the house. It’s well overdue but it feels sad anyway.

One of the girls in the office who I was commiserating with earlier about how much this week sucks just came into my office and said “As if that’s not enough I now have the Wiggles song Wake Up Jeff in my head!” I have cheered myself up by telling her I have the cure. She is very silly for agreeing. I got her to sing the chorus of Rah Rah Rasputin. Well, at least she doesn’t have The Wiggles on the brain any more. She is stalking around the office telling all that she is going to kill me, but at least I’m smiling now.

Add This to my List

September 9, 2009

Apparently it’s not normal to have a list of lists. What’s wrong with that, I say? I have lots of lists – a master list surely is a smart thing to keep all those lists in order. When I recently announced to my family that I have a master list, to keep track of my lists, and that each list is hyperlinked from the master list? Yeah, they all went very quiet. Then they all slowly shook their heads. (Well, I need a few lists – they keep me calm. Yes, I do realise I have a touch of OCD. But who doesn’t need a list for weekend holidays (two holiday houses, so that’s 2 different lists already), a list for overseas trips, a list of what needs renovating in my house (a looooong list, that one), a list of things I need to do, a list of what is for dinner that week each night, a grocery list, a work to-do list – you get the general idea.)

I bet none of them have cheese that looks as good as mine does though.

cheesy good

I hope it’s going to feed me well – the big R is going on at work (*shudder* – redundancies). I have to reapply for my job. Yep, the one I got bullied talked into applying for earlier this year.


August 3, 2009

On Friday I accidentally won another huge beef roast at The Local. I’m getting pretty good at making roast beef now, that’s for sure. Although I am getting a bit sick of roast beef sandwiches. This week’s roast was 2.5kg (5.5 pounds) and it was boneless so not any part of that weight was from a bone. Last week’s was even bigger. Luckily, I am not thinking of turning vegetarian any time soon.

The last 3 weeks have been rather boss-free at work, with him being on holidays. He’s back today. Something tells me I won’t be getting home early all week this week. Or coming in late. Gee the last 3 weeks were good though.

This financial year is the first year I am in charge of a budget at work. We are 1 month into the financial year and I have discovered already items that are regular charges that I did not budget for. This should be an interesting learning experience!

This is my little Ned. Ned likes to fall asleep while reading books. Ned was named after Ned Kelly the bushranger.


I booked a holiday in December. A cruise. It was a bargain price or I probably would have opted for something more exciting. I found out that someone from my work has booked the same cruise. Actually 2 people have – they both work at my work. I am friendly with them because I learned long ago to be nice to people at work, and they will remember that and help you out when you need it. If I didn’t have to be nice according to my rule I would say they are both wombats (waste of money, brains and time). Must spend next 4 months working out avoidance strategies and studying the layout of that ship.