Archive for December, 2008


December 31, 2008

The old year is drawing to a close. Tonight a dozen or so friends are coming over for a BBQ at the boyfriend’s house. He did get a little pissed off when I told him I bought a keg, he was frightened hordes of strangers would crash the party. But hey, what else can you abuse your relationship with The Local for if not to have them bring a keg to you, give you free gas, set the whole shebang up for you, then a select few of them even come over later to help you drink it  (like the old publican, the one we like heaps more than the evil new publican. Although new publican isn’t so evil since he wheeled a keg of beer up the street and brought free gas and ice to the door).

I’m at work. I seem to have forgotten that I had to work when I assured the boyfriend I could easily whip up salads and nibblies for 12 people. (HOW? HOW DID I THINK THIS? I AM AT WORK!) Somehow, between 4:30pm this afternoon when I get home (yep, am abusing my newfound powers and letting everyone go home at 3:30 today) and 6:30pm I need to make spinach dip, cheese platters, a particularly yummy special recipe potato salad, a pesto pasta salad, a garden salad, and probably a million other things. I suppose at least I didn’t plan on cooking satay skewers, chops and snags should be easy enough to sort out.

Countdown to New Year? It’s already started here, but it’s the countdown to 3:30pm! 25 minutes to go, and counting.

Have a fun NYE!


How I Turned Into a Cow

December 30, 2008

I’m hating being in charge at work. It’s just not my style to reprimand people for having a long lunch, or sneaking out early to do a spot of shopping – I’d rather be with them! However, this past 2 weeks has seen me turn into a bit of a cow. I can suddenly see why the boss is often so cranky. Adding to the absolute misery is the fact that anything that could possibly go wrong, has done so. We’ve had more major issues in a week than we had all last month, and even though they were all things outside of my control, it is reflecting poorly on me.

2 more days of this to get through, today and tomorrow, then I have 4 days to loll around sipping cocktails by the pool. OK, I don’t have a pool, and I’d rather have a beer, but I figure I’ll put a little paper umbrella in my beer and it’ll be almost the same thing.

Merry Christmas

December 24, 2008

Me? I’m  looking forward to the shenanigans being over. Roll on, Friday.

Sense and Nonsense

December 22, 2008


The boss went on 2 weeks holidays on Friday. Guess who got left in charge of the department? Yours truly! I’m sure it’s because I am the only one left in the department with the word ‘manager’ in their title. The shit has hit the fan every day since (we’re on day 2 now and I’ve had 4 serious issues to deal with and a skeleton staff to fix them. What The?)


We were disappointed to get no feedback from our pokies poster swap on Wednesday. I was at The Local on Sunday night. The publican was talking to 2 other licensees from the group. The incident was brought up. We were sitting 3 metres away listening to the conversation. Hillarious. The posters got photographed and sent in to head office. The publican has vowed to bar anyone involved if he finds out. One of the other licensees said “Are you kidding mate? I’d buy them a beer! Frigging hillarious!” Apparently they had no idea the switch had only occurred that night so didn’t even bother checking security tapes. Also the publican suspected a staff member may have done it. Of course, me laughing about it made one of the bar managers wander over and let me know she knew it was us. I smiled and said I would never tell who did it if I even knew. But she knows. That kind of makes it worth the risk – credit for a job well done.

Silly Season

December 19, 2008

The Local pub recently stole our beer garden to make a smoking pokie area. (Yes, of course we punters own it, not the pub owner or the evil publican. They will come and go, everyone knows the locals really own The Local.) So now we have nowhere to sit out in the sun (or rain) and drink beer and watch footy or whatever the current season’s sport is.

As a bit of revenge and also for a bit of fun, a couple of us decided to help out with some of the in house advertising that is held in little plastic holders off the side of each poker machine. One of the more common inserts in these holders is an orange and yellow sign that had a picture of a beer, with “THIRSTY? STAY SEATED! Our friendly attendants will be with you shortly”.

On Wednesday evening this week, most of the inserts held posters looking very very similar to that one, but they were slightly different. Some had a picture of a toilet with the text “BUSTING? STAY SEATED! Our friendly attendants will be with you shortly”. The rest had a picture of a smiling man’s face with “HORNY? STAY SEATED! Our friendly attendants will be with you shortly”.

At the end of our evening when still no staff had noticed the changes? We just left. Yesterday afternoon the boyfriend dropped in for a quick beer, and reported that all the signs were gone. No idea as yet if they knew it was us. If they watched the surveillance footage it will not be too hard to work out! Tonight is The Local’s Christmas party. I wonder if we will be welcome (although, really, how long can one get barred for a little practical joke like that when someone I know only got a month for weeing on the window (from the outside) when he got cut off).

I blame the silly season.

It’s Beginning to Look Alot Like Christmas

December 16, 2008

My mum’s started calling me Scrooge. I think it is due to my rather vocal disdain of Christmas. Perhaps if my family were not quite so dysfunctional I would be fine with it, but my Christmas Day actually just makes me understand why it is that the suicide rate escalates around Christmas.

I always love the parties and the functions beforehand though! However, I am starting to tire this year – perhaps I am getting old. This morning I actually laid down on the floor of the office for a while, explaining it away very convincingly as being for a bad back. Really though, I just wanted to lie down.

I think it is a clear sign that perhaps I should worry when I looked in my handbag this morning after arriving at work, only to discover a stubby holder (one of those things you put stubbies of beer in to keep them cool). I have no idea why I put it there, or when, but it made me laugh. Rather than deciding to dry out a bit before the silly season kills me I decided it must be a sign to catch up with my best friend this evening who is in town unexpectedly, and staying in some fancy apartment near town.


So tonight I have drinks with some ex work colleagues after work followed by dinner and a sleepover at my friends house (am I too old to call it a slumber party? And will she mind that I forgot to bring PJs with me? Ha). Tomorrow I am meeting friends at the pub to play pool, Thursday a dinner party at a friend’s place, Friday the local pub is having a Christmas Party. Then on the weekend? I will be doing my Christmas shopping. Yikes. Send help.


December 12, 2008

Yesterday afternoon I headed off to another Christmas party – this time a small gathering of 40 people for an afternoon harbour cruise. A fine time was had by all. Well, except for the girl who got so seasick she spent 2 hours throwing up and we ended up having to stop and let her off the boat. A fine time was not had by me this morning on trying to get out of bed and realising the room was still spinning.

I’ve managed to get through the day by getting a headset for my phone that I’ve been dialling in to the TV mounted on the wall in front of me which I have mentioned before. The headset is a vast improvement on holding the phone handset up to my head that I’d been doing up until now. All I need to do to make things better is paint eyeballs onto my eyelids and catch a few zzz’s. Perhaps I’ll tackle that one on Monday. Although I am finding that I am feeling my second wind coming along, increasingly so as 5pm rolls nearer and nearer.

Photo, Schmoto

December 9, 2008

I know, I know, you want to see a photo. It sounds like the most inventive excuse ever, but the girl with the camera had her dog die on the weekend and I haven’t been game to ask her for the pictures yet. I’ll be sure to post it (maybe) when I see them.

So the party was fun. A few funny moments in particular stand out. One was when my boss said to me “Cool peace medallion, where’d you get that!” I beamed at him and replied “I made it this afternoon instead of doing any work!” I think he thought I was kidding. I wasn’t.

I’d spent the afternoon getting hold of as many bad props as I could come up with. I made several tiny little braids in my hair with beads at the end (Man, those are hell to get out!). I also made a fake joint out of a cigarette with the butt ripped off, twisted to make something that sort of resembled a small joint. I was outside at  one point and offered a toke of my pretend joint to a girl standing next to me, making fun of my own props by this point. She said “Cool, man, mine’s hidden in my bra!” I looked at her. “Um… dude, mine’s a prop.” She looked back at me. “Do you know who I am?” I shook my head and said I didn’t. She said “Good!” and ran away. I never saw her again all night, but I sure got a laugh out of that.

Updated to add:

Ack. Who knew that wearing a fugly dress over the top of jeans and a shirt (so you don’t get strange looks on the way home – hey presto, lose the dress and the outfit is fine) would make one look like the side of a barn.


Hot Stuff

December 5, 2008

Tonight is the work Christmas Party. The theme is 70’s. I am going to look so damn hot.


I bought this dress/caftan some years ago for $3 at Vinnie’s, for a bad taste party. I ended up wearing a gorgeous hot pink parachute material tracksuit instead, so I am very pleased to finally get a chance to show this beauty off. I just tried it on – it looks hysterical. Although it kind of smells funny. Musty. Like old people. Or dead people.


December 3, 2008

Sometimes you see something that is just wrong. Usually I see several of these a day – for example, the young girl on the train this morning with the opaque thick black tights, white stillettos and grey bubble dress. You don’t always get a chance to take photos, even a photo with your crappy mobile phone that seems to dim everything. Sometimes, though? Sometimes, you do. And you have to wonder what someone was doing at my workplace today that involved sitting on the toilet, with a cup of coffee. Ew.