W-Erk!

There’s a fairly high focus in my workplace on first aid – and for some reason I agreed to be a first aid officer a while ago. (I think they meant it when they said they wanted me because I was calm under pressure. Which really, is funny – I have had a couple of real first aid type experiences outside of work – when I had to call an ambulance for the person who crashed their car badly outside my house I had the shakes for literally hours, and when I had to pick up my ex off the floor after he fell off a ladder I completely freaked out, he was gushing blood from the head and I was screaming, he had to shout at me to calm down before I could pull myself together enough to stop the blood and get him some medical help. Whatever, it can’t have been too bad if he was cognisant enough to say to the doctor “NOOOO! Don’t cut my hair off! Just staple it back together without that razor being involved!)

So somehow I have agreed to demonstrate CPR to one of the big bosses this afternoon. A really big huge important boss. I can only imagine it is to attempt to justify all the money we spend on training etc. Or perhaps to reassure him – Don’t Worry! If you fall down dead today? We’ll look after you! Let this team give you the kiss of life, just like this! Ew, I think a bit of vomit just came up into my mouth. I guess I should just be grateful I didn’t wear a short skirt today. Keep your fingers crossed that I get to man the defibrillator not the mouth.

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One Response to “W-Erk!”

  1. Jennifer Says:

    It either sounds like the plot of a dirty movie or a sexual harassment lawsuit. Fun day at work! 🙂

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